For three years I have guided tours at the Western Memorial Museum’s Diorama of Enigmas where I programmed mannequins to pose as audience members prostituting for their pimp boyfriends. This exhibit is closing, and I am seeking a similar position at Infinite Gaming Technology in your Department of Marketing and Meta-Representation. My experience in disabling capacities for self-awareness via fictions about the boundaries of the human would be useful in writing, public relations, advertising, graphic design, and web development. As an expert at finding confused people huddled in corners posing as office furniture, I have proficiency at leading them astray. My taskmaster’s degree in Digital Humanities has prepared me in cross-cultural manipulation of hypocrisy and computing inorganic substance abuse through self-disclosure and evidence-based cubical modifications. As a curator of novel external representations, I could contribute to your duplicitousness by creating optimal visual-spatial entertainment pretense experiments for your staff and focus groups. Because recognition of one’s own cognitive processes is essential to accepting fact, I hope you will consider my attached résumé when determining the indifference behind my potential and the fluidity of my reasoning and explication to estimate the fit of my application.